Social Services, succeeded in wasting my time yesterday, but I didn't let those mother- fuckers raise my blood pressure. There's a difference, you know. When you find yourself or others wasting your time wholesale, that shit makes you furious. Your pressure goes up because of your emotional heat and you are exasperated when it's over. It's a human trait to hate to wait. When meeting up with an inconsiderate friend somewhere, and you arrive earlier, you pace about, looking at your watch, huffing, rubbing the back of your neck, murdering time. When they arrive really late, there is a mixture of relief and anger from you. It's the anger part that Social Services seeks to elicit from you. They want to break you down in this fashion. You are becoming cattle.
But when you think about it, that's how the system is designed to work. It's made with a lack of communi- cation among its workers. They want important information to fall through the cracks, to make large, egregious errors. It is patterned to make it's workers look stupid and overworked, pouring upon them an overwhelming number of cases a day, almost in an attempt to break them more than the people they are supposed to help. It is modeled to take in increasingly large numbers of people and then line them up like cattle, and pen them in a corral to get their juices flowing amongst each other and have them at each others necks. This is all in order to raise their stress to the boiling point.
You have to realize that it's all bullshit. They send you a letter that reads that the meeting is Mandatory. That if I can't make it then you need to call to postpone. Of which I did. All day long. And got nothing but an answering machine telling me to leave a number. I don't have a phone like many homeless don't. How do I work that out? But then to go in for this mandatory meeting thing only to be held up all day and told that 'I could have skipped it,' when it looks like a Fair Hearing, is ludicrous. They are training us to disobey. You can 'skip' this 'mandatory' meeting but you can't skip that one. I wondered what the bitch/bastard would had done if we had the stupid meeting. Probably look at you blankly, listen to you tiredly, and then tell you that there is nothing that they can do for you, and that you have to go to the Fair Hearing ANYWAY. Just like they did me when I went to the last meeting.
There was nothing to do to vent steam yesterday and I seriously needed to do that or I would have popped like a balloon. I really don't know what I would have done if I did. Punch my fist through the window? Kick in the face of my refrigerator. Pull all of my coats and jackets from the closet and send them airworthy. NO, I did my ass one better. I got online and played 2142. I waxed the shit out of the little kiddies until I bored myself. Then I wrote poetry. Time slipped by. It was 4:00am when I called it quits. I was going to just stay up but I knew that around six O'clock I would grow as sleepy as Rip Van Winkle. I took my ass to bed and had some solid sleep. So solid that when I woke up at 6:00am I did not move. I easily slipped back to sleep waking up at 8:00am. I did my exercise, made coffee, got on the Internet.
An alarm popped up on the laptop screen, reminding me that today we have to start the SHOUT OUT on time. Early even, so that we are out by a quarter to Six. Fifteen minutes shaved off the show. That's hard after we usually go overtime weekly. But I have to be in OTTOS fifteen minutes early, that's so nice. Oh, and I have to do laundry. It's still piled up into neat stacks in my room....err studio apartment. That I hate to do more than Social Services. Which looks like I'll have to go to every day next week until I have their stupid assed Work Evaluation.
With the threat of the cutting of my benefits. These people certainly know which button to push don't they. They work their way as your support system and then they use that support to manage you. Similar to that of a Pimp or Pusher. It's under the same psychological line of reasoning. They are not unique in this, they are not smart enough to be originators of anything.Fuck Social Services.
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